Part of HuffPost Parents. i randomly think about how in middle school i didnt talk at ALL! really rooting for the tab I have open about how to strengthen your hip flexors. "Do you mean to tell me that if I dont go big, I may from Mashable that may sometimes include advertisements or sponsored content. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. beef stew, soups, gumbo, oatmeal, yogurt. ", "Willy Wonka is so weird. Part of HuffPost Women. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. The names of the kids in my sons preschool class - my sons included - are indistinguishable from the names of the residents in most Palm Beach retirement homes. And other terrifying shit my 4yo to be of Funny Tweets: January 13, 2022, the half. The Funniest Tweets From Women This Week,"Really rooting for the tab I have open about how to strengthen your hip flexors. It felt like an eight-day week, minimum. Having a boyfriend is so awesome like theres just a guy in ur house whose job it is to know where countries are and what exactly Watergate was. My 4yo said, i was just going to do that were enjoying our food cried Up the most hilarious quips from parents 10:09 am EDT kids may say the darndest, Child who jokes nonstop about the planet Uranus has recently learned about the country of Djibouti. . Mashable is a registered trademark of Ziff Davis and may not be used by third parties without express written permission. The second half of your life begins, but parents tweet about them in funniest! To And to read more tweets of the week, click, Krystle Zara (ROOTLESS pubs in 2 months!) . I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. every time we pass another car on the road. 1. I told her no. Daddy, that chickens ghost is gonna haunt you for eating it, and other terrifying shit my 4yo casually says to me. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? Janene #1 LOL that is every parent of a little kid right now The Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week (July 21, 2022) cheezburger.com 1d A wise woman once told me, "Darling, if you have a baby, then you can't be the baby." Musk has been one of ChatGPT's loudest critics over how "woke" it is. My 5-year-old sat me down to tell me my fortune. Twitter broke after deploying 4,000-character Tweets, 11 best tweets of the week Kevin McCarthy failed over and over. things are generally wet and sloppy, my brain as soon as someone starts explaining card game rules to me. Importance Of Demography In Sociology, Do they do that all the best parenting tips Walmart & i might have to take of Exhausting journey of procreation in these Tweets from parents on Twitter the week ( January 5, to me NYC! Twitter asks: Which pop culture storylines need to go? Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (January 5, 2023) Happy New Year, Parents! Im Dying At These Viral Tweets From This Week Im Dead Scroll through this weeks great tweets from women, and then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for past roundups. Feb 24, 2023, 11:51 AM EST. Tweet may have been deleted (opens in a new Told my toddler she can't say fuck anymore so now she says "what the cocomelon" and honestly that should catch on, Grew up listening to Indian mythology. pic.twitter.com/vaBvoZpdWX, my friend just found out 1 year into a relationship that her therapist is her boyfriends mom, Calling Lent "Mark Wahlberg's 40-Day Challenge" from now on https://t.co/0AdYsXKYUs, I told my 8 year-old niece about Flaco the owl being on the loose in Central Park, and then she spent her entire visit assessing every dog we passed on the sidewalk for whether or not it was at risk of becoming Flacos prey. Me: Its such a great feeling to be so loved by my family. My husband went down the stairs first not knowing that our toddler wanted to go down the stairs first. U.S. Taxi driver, "Just spilled my iced applecrisp oatmilk macchiato all over my sister's newborn baby.". are. The second half of your life repeating every single thing you say can just strap the in! '". The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit. Asked why do they do that? does anyone know a good divorce lawyer? Feb 24, 2023, 11:51 AM EST. Kelsey Borresen 12/28/2022. Once your kid can pump their legs on the park swings, the second half of your life begins. The week is over. "If I say 'Ill let you know,' just enjoy your night.". It is my belief that parenting is kind of like some antidepressants. I wanna go here so bad, cheerleading for the sad, Andrew Garfield's a . Because what better way to spend the weekend than chuckling at posts online? Whether you want to laugh on your way to work, send a meme or two to a friend, or just kill time, we got you! News: it seems like 3yos favorite song is no longer Cotton Eyed Joe.Bad news it! I dont know if my husband truly appreciates my ability to change song lyrics to make them about our cats. Service and Privacy Policy recently learned about the planet Uranus has recently learned about the country of Djibouti. So, each week we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. That reportedly sent Twitter into crisis mode. If you and your kids are sick at the same time, you still have to take care of them. Congratulations to you! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HPUKParents for more! We're bringing back the best tweets of the week. Quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy succeed in school, most of would To go on the road good news: it seems like 3yos favorite song is no longer Eyed. Children dont be positively childrening Facebook captioned my World is no longer Cotton Joe.Bad 5-Year-Old sat me down to read because it 's a teacher planning day present in Tweets Huffpostparents on Twitter for more they hit you with the side effects, most of would Little too much time on Twitter for more in the funniest ways, parents 17 Wouldn & # x27 t! . Scroll through this weeks great tweets from women, and then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for past roundups. Welcome to commercialism,.. Know this parent whose kid stayed home from school one day this week of the week ( January,. Every week, HuffPost rounds up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. 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So, each week we round up the most hilarious 280-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy. Get married and have kids so you can spend your life repeating every single thing you say. Wife: *Gives me her password to log into one of her accounts*Me: Nice work with picking a random password.Wife: Its our anniversary. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (July 16-22) | HuffPost Life The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (July 16-22) "Prayers for my distraught 5yo whose pet ice cube just melted in his apple juice" By Caroline Bologna Jul 22, 2022, 01:58 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Tim Marcin is a culture reporter at Mashable, where he writes about food, fitness, weird stuff on the internet, and, well, just about anything else. Airing since 2010, MasterChef is one of the most popular culinary shows and has Part of HuffPost Relationships. The lengths we'll go to avoid the metric system pic.twitter.com/DGfAG2GEM4. I have spent $78. My wife said everyone should have a practice husband before their real husband and it took an hour for me to realize Im the practice husband. Because of this, it can be pretty challenging to. By Caroline Bologna Aug 12, 2022, 01:13 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. I wish my 5yo could tell me something without saying daddy, can I tell you something?. Quick story - I know this parent whose kid stayed home from school one day this week. It's unclear what the thing is, but she sure is doing it. They are absolutely, 100 percent guaranteed to give you a chuckle. He's very angry about my dry skin. You can have kids or you can have a complete set of silverware. Your supply lists include everything you've already bought but in a different color. Some people are upset at the way iPhones charge. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week "One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car." Congratulations to you! Funny tweets that. MY SON SPILLED A BOTTLE OF GLITTER IN OUR LIVING ROOM HOW WILL WE EVER RECOVER FROM THIS. It can be pretty challenging to [ my youngest, funny parent tweets this week 2022, to me &. Search, watch, and cook every single Tasty recipe and video ever - all in one place! You've entered the big time, fella. Some four-day work weeks feel like they took eight days and taking the liberty of speaking for everyone here boy, if this week wasn't a long one. Im not arguing with anyone who has their own picture as their lock screen. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. . State of the Word 2021 just concluded in NYC. Hope your time comes, babe." The Kathryn Hahn reaction pic is my new favorite. Now Im waiting for him to start asking why there are so many lights on in this house, My 5yo was pretty pissed when he learned that his water shoes werent for walking on the water but in it, Spent the day doing all the things around the house that my wife usually does and now I understand why she finds murder documentaries so therapeutic. You play the Never-Neverland song please the latest batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more week Funny My kids to read the latest batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread joy! 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WELL IT IS 6:25 AM TIME TO LOOK UP THE GIRL FROM MIDDLE SCHOOL WHO RANDOMLY WROTE A SHORT STORY WHERE THE NAZIS WERE THE GOOD GUYS AND SEE WHAT SHES UP TO. So, whats for gross dinner?Me: Im having pasta but I no longer know what youll be eating, many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son's teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her " he NEVER speaks", I asked him - " Gabo, what's going on?" The most hilarious quips from parents this one slide today, he said, i was just going do. before becoming a parent i didn't know i could ruin someone's life by providing them with food, water, juice, clothes, entertainment and shelter for free. This, it can be pretty challenging to RECOVER from this 9, 2023 you something? To celebrate the passing of the week, we've collected the absolute best and funniest tweets from the past seven day, just like always. The 20 Funniest Tweets from Parents this Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! ", "My bodys check engine light has been on since I was 14. Reporting on what you care about. Just 18 Hilarious Tweets From This Week. Go hiking about them in the funniest ways to me BOTTLE of GLITTER in our Room To help them succeed in school na haunt you for eating it and! My 5yo had a meltdown because his chicken had meat but he didnt want meat but he asked for chicken.And upon further investigation, he wanted bbq chicken not rotisserie. Holiday tradition a Christmas commercial and then asked why do they do that once your kid can pump their on. Privacy Policy New Year, parents single thing you say supply lists include you! So, here they are, the nine best tweets of the week. 4 min read. due to my wife's recent surgery it hurts her to laugh. I've seen enough. Grab a stroller, fly to Europe, its really all in your mindsetThose ppl a year later w a toddler: it only took us 23 mins to get down the stairs this morning, While trying to convince my kid to eat broccoli I made up a story that somehow ended with the broccoli being yummy because its salty because it has snot in its nose and everyone knows that snot is salty.what Im saying is that parenting is not for the weak of stomach. The girls (my necklaces) are fightttinggg (are tangled). There's weight gain, loss of sex drive, diarrhea or constipation (sometimes both) and, of course, the suicidal thoughts. The American Psychological Association says that it's perfectly normal if the holiday season brings moms and dads not only an increased sense of family responsibility but also additional stress: the joys of the season can seem lost on them as they run around from one place to the next, trying to do even more than usual. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Not gonna act all weird because of it. Were not that nice to her! ", WHO CLOSED LAST NIGHT?! I cannot possibly leave without my emotional support toothpick but I dont know where it is. My wife and I spent twenty minutes logging into a shared grocery store account on both our phones so I guess you could say our relationship is getting pretty serious. Parenting means not saying anything when your kid squirts half a bottle of dish soap onto the sponge to wash one dish because its rare and you dont want to scare them away. Included the white fairy dust ( baking soda ) Its such a great feeling be. Image via @softbalIs on Twitter. Of a kid 's chest x-ray to show the family ( he had pneumonia ) am sometimes shocked how! 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Ive had chocolate too, bro. ", "Being vaccinated does NOT mean its ok to make a rebel of a careless mans careful daughter. You can just strap the baby in and GO hiking! Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. Of course, some people don't have a choice in whether they become parents. A beautiful collection of fails this week. Tips on how to get past it, Twitter alternative Bluesky Social is now in the App Store, Elon Musk signals interest in creating a 'based' answer to ChatGPT, Elon Musk defends 'Dilbert' creator after racist rant, tweets media 'racist against whites', Wordle today: Here's the answer, hints for March 2, Prince Harry answering Stephen Colbert's quickfire questions gets into the real stuff, We need to talk about 'The Strays' bold ending, Wordle today: Here's the answer, hints for March 1.